When the Flames Go Up is a blog written by two former spouses, Moxie of AskMoxie.org and LOD of LaidOffDad.org. We decided to write this blog because when we were getting divorced, we couldn’t find anyone writing about divorce and co-parenting that wasn’t either legal, logistical, or filled with rage. We’re hoping those of you that are going on this same painful journey find it helpful to see that you’re not alone.

We intend this blog to be about process. It won’t be an airing of grievances, but we’re not going to be shiny and new all the time. Divorce sucks. Co-parenting is hard.

We were married for 9 1/2 years, if you count the last two that it took from the time we started the divorce process until we got the final decree in November 2008. We now live within walking distance of each other in New York City. We have two elementary-age sons, R and T. We really don’t have much in common, but we love our boys.